It was the story of her own uncle, John Relf, that became the inspiration for Edina resident Mary Lilja to help others find a way to pass along their own precious family stories.
“Several years ago, my uncle had written about our ancestors—in longhand—and wanted to find a way to share it with the family,” says Lilja, president of the public relations firm Lilja Inc. “There was a little bit of urgency for us to put it together because my uncle was battling melanoma at the time.”
Lilja transcribed Relf’s notes and assembled them into a book, then added family photos and distributed it at a family reunion. She was struck not only by the impact her Uncle John’s story had on the entire family—including his recollections of the family’s St. Paul home—but also amazed by the rich conversations among family members prompted by the sharing of memories. That family reunion was especially poignant since Relf died not long afterward.
“I knew then that I wanted to help other families tell their stories,” recalls Lilja. “I understood that this is real work.”
Not long afterward, Lilja launched Lilja LifeStories, based at the Lilja office in Eden Prairie. She and Lilja LifeStories vice-president Linda Tedford, also an Edina resident, as well as other staff members including Kadee Crottier, offer writing, editing and design services, and provide the opportunity for clients to print as many (or as few copies) of the books as they desire via the Lilja Press imprint.
While many Lilja LifeStories begin with old letters or other family documents, Lilja and Tedford also spend time in conversation with clients to help determine the scope of the project, whether it entails editing a manuscript already written by the client or penning the stories themselves, and corresponding with the client at each stage.
“In the interviews, we have our laptops and record verbatim what they tell us,” says Tedford, who adds that she feels honored to be trusted with her clients’ stories and privileged to help tell them.
One Lilja Press book, Dearest Darling, is a collection of letters written by Raymond Newman to Ellen Omernik, the woman who would become his wife. Most pages feature the image of a letter; Ellen stored all of them in a shoebox for many years. Newman’s children also worked with Lilja LifeStories on another book, Home on the Range: Growing Up in a Northern Minnesota Mining Town, a compilation of Newman’s stories about life on the Iron Range. His family published the tribute after Newman’s death.
“Most of the projects we do are written and produced for family only,” says Lilja, but some are produced for wider audiences and distribution. “It’s an opportunity for them to put a frame around many of the stories they heard while they were growing up.”
Since the finished products are all professionally rendered, Tedford believes they offer the family “a piece of art that’s very accessible” and something she feels can be easily handed down from one generation to the next. While the company will certainly work with digital files, both women wonder whether emails, as opposed to handwritten documents, will ultimately stand the test of time.
Many Lilja LifeStories clients are seniors, although there are others who want to record their stories for their family members, too. “We baby boomers are going to want to make sense of things and tie up our legacy,” says Lilja.
Tedford, who has been meeting with several senior groups to talk about Lilja LifeStories, says that many seniors just need encouragement from family members to record their stories.
“I’ve heard some say they don’t think their children will value their experiences, so that’s why it’s important for families to affirm the fact that they do want those stories before they are gone forever,” says Tedford, adding that this is particularly important if the older family member is beginning to experience memory loss.
Lilja LifeStories is not limited to personal accounts—the company can also work with business owners to share the rich history of family-owned businesses, which have unique stories of their own.
“Family stories can be so profound,” says Lilja. “They focus on history, values and so many things that really matter a great deal to people. For those who feel intimidated by the process of telling their own stories, we can help in any way they need us and we love doing it.”
